Things Said And Done
by Mystical Machine Gun
Summary: Alcohol and conversation mixed up with each other can lead to unpredictable things. One moment you are hetero, the next gay and after denying everything you are still in the bed with the one you love - but how? SasuNaru, M for SEX
1. Chapter 1

The hell, now no one can say that I do not use quotation marks or that I merely rely on proper language - here I present a purely conversation-based story and with lots of quotation marks (you can count them if you want)! Well, now there is no actual "story" - this is just the opposite what I usually write. I just wanted to do this, since I have not used those devilish marks before. So there you go, like it or hate it - but tell me which one ;D (TWOSHOT)

Please do not flame (I do not find a reason for it so you better not either). I apologize for the possible misspellings and other errors.

CHECK OUT MY OTHER SASUNARU/NARUSASU STORIES TOO AND TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK!

**Pairing**: Sasuke x Naruto

**Summary**: Alcohol and conversation mixed up with each other can lead to unpredictable things. One moment you are hetero, the next gay and after denying everything you are still in the bed with the one you love - but how? SasuNaru, M for SEX

**Disclaimer**: I have no rights over the characters or whatsoever (do not sue me Mr. Kishimoto), I am just loaning them and returning to the rightful owner (Mr. Kishimoto).

_**Things Said And Done**_

**Naruto**: "I'm disappointed in myself. You know, we're already seventeen and I'm still a fucking virgin. I don't know what it is; am I repulsive or what? Fuck and you can get all the ladies you could ever want, geez. What magic do you use you Harry fucking Potter? I want some fairy dust too you fucking Tinkerbelle…pour more booze Sasuke, I wanna drown in this sweet nonexistence we mortals call alcohol. Oh, I can't feel my tongue anymore, sweet…"

**Sasuke**: "You should probably slow down Naruto - I don't want you to puke on my shoes like last time…That girl matter; you should be lucky…half of those sweet-talkers are purely after my arse and fuck do I sound gay saying this, but I'd want somebody to recognize me behind these garments."

**Naruto**: "Well, I recognize you're naked under your clothes, haha. No, actually I know what you mean. All the people here think I'm just a stupid loudmouth, but I'm a decent guy, you know - for real, dude. I don't cheat, I've got brains and I can be sweet if needed. So, why the fuck I don't get laid??"

**Sasuke**: "The reason is probably that you're everybody's friend but no one's beloved. That happens…they just don't see the potential, but hey, it's their loss. Okay, maybe it's yours too, but at least there are people who care about you. I'd want people to care about me like that too."

**Naruto**: "Aww, Sasuke, I care about you - I even probably love you too, dude. Pour some more. You know, you give off the image of not caring and somehow I think people find you hard to approach. Hell, you've got a mean streak, you scare people off - except me that is, since I've grown to like it somehow."

**Sasuke**: "You sound fucking sappy, Naruto. Give the bottle back - I paid for it you dipshit! Although, I think you might be right…but I never admitted it if anyone asks. Dude, that'd be sad…"

**Naruto**: "Naah, it ain't sad, but I won't tell - it's our secret, haha. Hey, I wanted to ask you this a long time ago, but I didn't have the guts…If and when the time comes, how do I know how to do it? Sex, I mean. Somehow I don't think it's equal to porn movies -not that they aren't educational…maybe- and I don't wanna screw up. I know this is lame, but I'd like to think it as being 'precautious'. Just in case."

**Sasuke**: "I've never told anyone about this, but…I actually haven't done it all the way with anyone before so I might not be the right person to teach you the fucking Kama Sutra. Not that there weren't opportunities…it just didn't feel right. Maybe I'm looking for the one or something."

**Naruto**: "…Or being gay, hah. Sorry, I'm just barely amazed that you've never done it thoroughly before. Everyone thinks you're a womanizer, Sasuke. Actually, I'm glad, since now I don't feel so low - you're just as looser as I am, haha."

**Sasuke**: "Hmm…Can I kiss you?"

**Naruto**: "What?? Where did that come from?? Are you gay after all? You know, I happen to like girls and stuff…not cock and balls, well, except baseball, but that's beside the point really. I don't wanna hurt your feelings; you're pretty for a guy and I'd bang you if you had a joybox instead of joystick and well, well…"

**Sasuke**: "I ain't fucking asking you to marry me, so shut the fuck up. I need to test something out and you're my best friend. Fuck, I'm asking your help, you shithead. All the guys do it with each other and you can always blame alcohol. Actually, you blame alcohol about everything…and it's not like this is our first time either…"

**Naruto**: "That other time does not count! I was drunk, yeah, it was the alcohol…shit, I always seem to blame the devilish liquid…Okay fine, but just one kiss or a peck on the lips…no slimy stuff or anything."

**Sasuke**: "Yeah, yeah. Come closer - how can we kiss if you're that far away? You dumb or something? Close your eyes, they distract me. So, here we go..."

**Naruto**: "Oomph, you fucking stuck your tongue inside my mouth! I said no slimy stuff you fucker!! Dude, that was gross."

**Sasuke**: "Fuck…"

**Naruto**: "What now?"

**Sasuke**: "Nothing…"

**Naruto**: "Nothing? You're fucking red, man."

**Sasuke**: "I…think…I wanna kiss you again…"

**Naruto**: "WHAT??"

**Sasuke**: "Can I?"

**Naruto**: "Can you what?"

**Sasuke**: "Fucking kiss you, you dipshit. Fuck…I might like you, like that, you know. I might have liked you for along time…like, I knew I kind of liked you before, well, hmm, you know and…maybe that's why I never did it with Sakura till the end…'cause maybe just the slightest I wanted to do it with you or something…maybe…yeah, definitely maybe."

**Naruto**: "WHAT?? Definitely maybe?? Why the fuck did you turn Sakura down?? Oh yeah…and why the fuck would you want to fuck me?? Dude, I'm a guy - I've got a dick, you know. At least the last time I checked…Have you watched me in the locker-room?? Dude, that's sick!!"

**Sasuke**: "Like I can fucking help it?? Do you think I'm damn happy about this?? Do you know how fucking hard it is to hide your boner when watching your best friend in shower??"

**Naruto**: "Too much information!! I don't wanna know…laalaalaa…I've got my ears shut…laalaaalaa. You, you need medication! Like antihomo pills or something. Hey…I get it…you're fucking around, aren't you? I haven't seen you with guys like that…not that I'd want, but anyhow. You are so drunk, man!! Haha!"

**Sasuke**: "…Fuck you, Naruto. I tired to be sincere and you are fucking mocking me. You go and fuck yourself, the hell I care…I'm leaving."

**Naruto**: "This is your house, you know. Where would you go? Okay, I'm sorry - I didn't mean what I said. Apology accepted?"

**Sasuke**: "I wanna a make-out kiss."

**Naruto**: "Why do you need to be such an arse for crying out loud?? I apologized!! What more is there to do??"

**Sasuke**: "A kiss, you arse-faced stupid punk."

**Naruto**: "Fine, but only one and then we go to bed. No, not bed together and hell no, we ain't sleeping together. You'd probably drool in my ear or something disgusting. One goodnight kiss…oh, I fucking sound like a mom or a girlfriend - my skin is itching because of it."

**Sasuke**: "Meanie! I'm in need! Do something about it! You drank my booze - I want compensation!"

**Naruto**: "Shit…just a kiss, okay? We really need to discuss this tomorrow…gay…what the fuck…maybe you're only a kissing monster…Okay, let's do it. The kiss, I mean - shit, get your hands away from under my shirt! Sasukeee!"

**Sasuke**: "Just a little bit, okay? Like, it won't kill you if I fondle your chest. Shit, you got smooth skin; can I take off your shirt? It's not like I'm molesting you! Don't look so frightened…A little cuddling can't kill anyone, you know?"

**Naruto**: "Fucking Sasuke, you stuck your tongue into my mouth - again. I don't like that kind…of…shit…aah, naah - fuck, take your hands away from my pants!! This is crossing the line!! Stop it, shit, don't! Holy hell, you got talented fingers…What is that wet…?? Oh God, why the hell am I letting you to suck me?"


	2. Chapter 2

The hell, now no one can say that I do not use quotation marks or that my stories need those - here I present a purely conversation-based story and with lots of quotation marks (you can count them if you want)! Well, now there is no actual "story" - this is just the opposite what I usually write. I just wanted to do this, since I have not used those devilish marks before. So there you go, like or hate it - but tell me which one ;D

Please do not flame (I do not find a reason for it so you better not either). I apologize for the possible misspellings and other errors.

CHECK OUT MY OTHER SASUNARU/NARUSASU STORIES TOO AND TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK!

**Pairing**: Sasuke x Naruto

**Summary**: Alcohol and conversation mixed up with each other can lead to unpredictable things. One moment you are hetero, the next gay and after denying everything you are still in the bed with the one you love - but how? SasuNaru, M for SEX

**Disclaimer**: I have no rights over the characters or whatsoever (do not sue me Mr. Kishimoto), I am just loaning them and returning to the rightful owner (Mr. Kishimoto).

**Sasuke**: "Uh, you stopped complaining, am I that good? Should I continue?"

**Naruto**: "Shit…"

**Sasuke**: "I take that as a yes. You taste nice…applesauce…"

**Naruto**: "Grrr…oh God, stop using your tongue, fuck I'm coming!!"

**Sasuke**: "Well, that didn't take long…"

**Naruto**: "Fuck you. It's not everyday somebody sucks your cock, so what if I lost the control - I was taken by surprise! You God damn punk! And…what the hell, you fucking gave a blowjob to me! What the hell! Why did I let that happen? There must be something wrong with me…and just in case, I ain't gay, so don't get your hopes up. It was the alcohol, yep, it's always the alcohol."

**Sasuke**: "You're pathetic at convincing yourself. I sucked you and liked it, why deny? It's not like the world is ending you Chicken Little. By the way, who the fuck says I'm gay??"

**Naruto**: "Err, it doesn't have to be said - you proved it already. If sucking your best friend's cock ain't gay, I don't know what is. What does it make me? Oh God…"

**Sasuke**: "Don't be so fucking shocked, we haven't even done anything dirty. Yet. All the guys suck each other's dicks, I assure you. Ask Kiba."

**Naruto**: "Kiba…? With who? Eew! No, I don't even wanna know! Hmm, now I got it - this was experimenting! You were tutoring me, yeah, sex issues, so I'm perfectly hetero. What a relief. For a second I thought I liked what you did, but that was a liquid illusion."

**Sasuke**: "Did you know that if you are drunk enough you can't get it up? So that means you got it up 'cause you liked it. If you'd been wasted then you could say you're a hetero. So there goes your logic. Now that I proved you liked my act, how about we continue in the name of tutoring?"

**Naruto**: "Continue what? All the way? Like, you sticking you dirty cock up my arse? Dream on, Sasuke. If I was gayish a moment ago, I ain't it anymore. This is like stupid, you know. Why are we even discussing this? Give me the bottle."

**Sasuke**: "I'll show how it's done, sex, I mean. It ain't gay if I'm only teaching you. I'm horny and there're no girls around so can I pleaaaze bang you? I bet you're fucking tight…"

**Naruto**: "So, basically you're just after my arse. Looking for a hole in which to penetrate? Nice one, Sasuke…Thanks a lot; I really thought I meant something to you. What a load of bullshit that 'I like you' stuff!! Go find yourself a whore you stupid prick…"

**Sasuke**: "No, no I didn't meant it like that…I really like you…I just thought you found it gross, so I thought I'd make it sound like it was just…just an experiment or something. I wouldn't wanna fuck you if I didn't have a crush on you!! Fuck, there - I said it. Are you happy? Now you fucking hate me…"

**Naruto**: "I don't hate you! I…only wanna be someone to you…I…shit, I didn't hate you kissing me, not to forget the sucking part…"

**Sasuke**: "So, does this mean I can kiss you…? Hold you…? Just the slightest?"

**Naruto**: "…Yeah…"

**Sasuke**: "Oh God, you taste so good and your lips…are so soft. I'm going insane…can I take off your shirt? Hold your hands up…wow, you got so velvety skin."

**Naruto**: "You take off your shirt too…kiss me more…fuck, your fingers feel chilly."

**Sasuke**: "Turn more this way so I can unzip your pants, Naruto. Lay down a bit and raise your hips. Now, hold on a sec…there. Okay, I'll unzip mine too, happy? I'd have done it sooner or later…"

**Naruto**: "…Bed…your room…where the fuck was it?"

**Sasuke**: "Take my hand, I'll lead you. Don't stumble; what did I tell you? Geez…"

**Naruto**: "You pulled too fast…"

**Sasuke**: "Sorry, follow me…"

**Naruto**: "Shit, why did you have to throw me on to the bed?"

**Sasuke**: "Stop whining and let me make you feel good. Get down on your knees face heading the wall. Lift your hips and arse. Good…you're so amazing…I'll insert a finger first so it won't hurt so much. I think I have some lube in the closet, wait a sec."

**Naruto**: "Shit, I'm scared…if it hurts a lot, stop, okay?"

**Sasuke**: "Of course. Now, spread your legs so I can move in between your legs. Here we go…"

**Naruto**: "Fuck, it feels like I'm shitting myself."

**Sasuke**: "…I'm adding another one."

**Naruto**: "Fucking fuck that hurts now. I'm not sure if I stretch enough, I might break apart…fuck."

**Sasuke**: "It'll be alright…just breathe…Okay, I think I prepared you enough. I know it'll hurt, but bear with me, Naruto? I'll slide it in now."

**Naruto**: "Shit, stop. Fuck, it hurts, pull back!!"

**Sasuke**: "It's not even in, I can't get it in fully. You're so fucking tight…I push it a little downwards. Now the head is in."

**Naruto**: "Stop, it hurts, I don't want it!!"

**Sasuke**: "Shush, nothing to worry about - let's take this slowly. I promise to make you feel better, okay? Trust me, I don't wanna hurt you…it's the last thing I'd want. Breathe in and out. I push it in a little bit more. Shit, urgh, it's in…"

**Naruto**: "Fuck, don't move. Oi, that feels like my insides are ripped out and smashed into the gutter…Let me get adjusted, no fuck, pull out!!"

**Sasuke**: "Okay, okay, don't panic! I'm out, I'm out!! Should we try it one more time? I promise to be gentle, okay? You made me want this more than anything…if it still hurts like hell, we stop, okay?"

**Naruto**: "Don't just repeat okay!! You ain't got a dick shoved up in your arse!! Okay, okay, one more try - but only 'cause you looked like a puppy…"

**Sasuke**: "Puppy, my arse…you want this as much as me…you're leaking milk, Naruto…"

**Naruto**: "Shut the fuck up and do it."

**Sasuke**: "Here I go. Now it's half way there, breathe, just a little more…there, I'm in."

**Naruto**: "Huff, it doesn't feel so bad now although my arse is like on fire…you can start to move now, but slowly. No banging me into the mattress or I'll fucking kill you. Unh, that actually feels nice, it tickles…a little bit faster…don't stop."

**Sasuke**: "Naruto…you feel so amazing…fuck, I love you…I'm…in love with you…shit, you're sucking me in fully."

**Naruto**: "Shit, fuck, I'm coming, I can't hold it in! Deeper, Sasuke! Oh, shit…aaargh!! Fuck!"

**Sasuke**: "I'm near, I'm near…fuck…Oh, my God…!!"

**Naruto**: "Shit, Sasuke, you came inside me…it feels weird…you're heavy on top of me."

**Sasuke**: "Sorry…all my strength left me in that instance. Sorry for not pulling out before ejaculating…"

**Naruto**: "You said ejaculate, that's gross!! Hnn, your bed feels nice…warm and soft. By the way, did you say love?"

**Sasuke**: "No, I didn't..."

**Naruto**: "You're blushing, man! I'm positive I heard you moan you loved me. Is it true?"

**Sasuke**: "…Maybe. Do I gross you out?"

**Naruto**: "After this? Kind of hard, you know. What does your love mean?"

**Sasuke**: "…Well, I care for you…I wanna be like this, I wanna hold you, keep you and and, you know - stuff."

**Naruto**: "Like dating? You know it'll be harder than anything in our lives till this point. Two guys…"

**Sasuke**: "So, you're considering? Does this mean you like me even the slightest the way I like you?"

**Naruto**: "Are you stupid? I let you made love to me. I don't sleep with everybody. Maybe I wanted it too…but it's not just that. I hate the fact that we ain't enough. I wanna be with you too, like forever and stuff and shit, I found my soul mate and like that, but life ain't that easy. We're doing something we shouldn't, the forbidden fruit. Even the purest of things aren't accepted if they defy norms."

**Sasuke**: "Are you the pessimist or what…so, you mean this was it or something? Just 'cause life ain't fare, we should accept it as it comes? Hell, I wanna fight, if it means that one day I can walk hand in hand with you. Maybe it'll take an eternity, but I can wait."

**Naruto**: "You'd waste your life…you -no we- need to start our own families, have children and all that shit. Life with me means hardships and constant battles…"

**Sasuke**: "Why don't you trust us even the slightest? We've been friends forever - it's only one step further. I want to take it with you and more of those. Talk about depression after sex…"

**Naruto**: "It's not like I don't wanna fight…more like, if I'm not strong enough to do it?

**Sasuke**: "Why wouldn't you be?"

**Naruto**: "I didn't mean it like that…I wanna. You know, because I love you too."

**Sasuke**: "I was kind of waiting for you to say that."

**Naruto**: "Love, you mean? Dude, you're sappy and beet-red! Where's the tutu?? Bring the man his skirt!!"

**Sasuke**: "Oh, fuck you Naruto. I just wanted to hear the words so I'd know I wasn't imagining things."

**Naruto**: "…I know…"

**Sasuke**: "How about we stay naked in the bed the whole day? I don't wanna get up; you're warm and soft…like the bed…"

**Naruto**: "Fine by me, shit, stop tickling!! I'm so going to devour you!"

**Sasuke**: "And that's fine by me…"

**Naruto**: "So, this is how love tastes like…"

**Sasuke**: "Actually - that might be sperm…"

**Naruto**: "I fucking kill you for ruining the moment."

**Sasuke**: "Naah, don't be so stuck up, Naruto. You know, you strangling me actually hurts…"

**Naruto**: "This is loving you to death…"

**Sasuke**: "It sure feels like it. Can I kiss you?"

**Naruto**: "I'd really want that, my lips are itching."

**Sasuke**: "Good. But, could you let me go now? It's kind of hard to kiss you like this."

**Naruto**: "Yeah, sorry…I love you"

**Sasuke**: "I love you too."


End file.
